hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
