NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
