Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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