i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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