I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
