Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
