i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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