To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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