GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Randomize
