sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
