dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize