i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize