i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
