I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
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