your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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