I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
