As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
