Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
