phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
