well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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