So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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