Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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