That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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