OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
