Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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