I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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