It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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