So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
