What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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