if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Randomize
