You're my little dorito
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
