Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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