why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
