I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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