Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Randomize
