He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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