so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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