So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize