Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
