i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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