loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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