Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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