all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
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