he shaved USA in his pubs
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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