no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize