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Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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