i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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