dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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