he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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