I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
