If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
please don't ironically join a cult
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