did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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